One of my daughters mentioned being an introvert recently. I told her how I was too.
She said, "Mom, you are definitely not an introvert."
That bothered me because I have always thought of myself as one. I decided to pursue this with another daughter. Same response. This daughter told me, "No way. You're not an introvert. You're so friendly and talk to everyone."
Both daughters had to be wrong. Hey, I am a shy person. Also I think an introvert fits being a writer more than an extrovert does. Introverts are more mysterious because you don't know what they are really thinking. So when my sister-in-law stopped in to visit after these conversations, I told her how I disagreed with my daughters telling me that I'm an extrovert.
Guess what? She laughed at me. In an amused voice, she said, "You're an extrovert."
Okay, that's true what all three said about me. I am pretty outgoing and I'm energized when I'm around others. While growing up though I was more of an introvert. I came out of my shell when I carhopped at a root beer stand during high school. But I am still quiet when I feel uncomfortable in certain situations. I might be reflective when I'm out of my element and exhibit an introvert's personality traits. My small talk with new people is definitely a bonus to my writing because people seem to open up and reveal a great deal to me. Of course, I don't use what they say for my characters, but it gives me ideas to incorporate in my stories.
This extrovert and introvert topic got me to thinking about my characters. Are they extroverts or introverts? In my recent release, Marrying Mallory, there's no doubt that Mallory Harrington is an extrovert. She has no problem meeting new people. Mallory surprises Dr. Seth Whitman with her honesty when they first meet. Catherine Steel is an investigative reporter in my chick-lit mystery, A Fiery Secret. She does her best thinking while speaking to murder suspects, which is a characteristic of an extrovert. Whitney Benson in my contemporary romance, Whitney in Charge, is an extrovert but she has some introverted feelings when it comes to men.
My favorite part of writing is creating the dialogue for my books. I just can't escape my desire to speak to others whether it's in a real life or for my characters.
Are you an introvert or extrovert? Do you prefer to read romances where the heroine is an extrovert or an introvert?
Diane Craver
Newest Release: Marrying Mallory
http://www.dianecraver.com
http://www.dianecraver.com/blog
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16 comments:
Come to think of it, I think writers are a little of both, because they spend so much time writing, and alone, they tend to seem introverted, but they do know how to socialize and they have to because without it, how could we sell a book?
The way we have to hustle to sell books and promote ourselves sometimes makes us an extrovert,but it can go against our very own nature to some extent.
This is a great topic and maybe we should look at ourselves and our characters a little more. I think our heroes tend to be more introverts because theyd on't share their feelings as easily.
Love and blessings
Rita
I've always thought introvert and extrovert have more to do which you're more recharged by:
If you're more recharged being alone or with only one or two people at a time, you're an introvert.
If you thrive in crowds, you're definitely an extrovert.
I'm definitely an introvert. I am so drained by being in crowds--even just going to church on Sunday. I'm not a people person at all. I recharge my batteries by being at home with just my family around me.
Karen Wiesner
http://www.karenwiesner.com
I'm definitely an introvert. I'm going to a conference next month and I'm excited about going but nervous that I'll cling to the wall or hide in my room.
What an interesting topic! I never thought about what I am, but like you I think I'm an introvert. My heroines are mixed but I think most have been introverts as well. LOL
I agree that an author has to be a a bit of both. I enjoy people and conversation. At the same time, I absolutely need the solitude that my writing demands.
Come to think of it, my heroines are are all pretty out-going and assertive.
Hi Diane! Great post, I am an extrovert. I love people. I love meeting them, watching them and in general asking them questions. LOL I have been told that I will ask the questions other people avoid and have rarely found that it bothers anyone. Of course, I have the introvert in me but I make her stay behind. LOL
Hey Diane,
I can fake being an extrovert for short bursts of time, but I am an introvert because I get drained being around people. I recharge when I am alone. I have written introverted heroines and extroverted ones.
Great topic!
Your SRN pal, Maggie
www.maggietoussaint.com
I'm an introvert but I've been working on that. As for reading, it doesn't matter to me if the heroine is an introvert or an extrovert.
Thank you for taking the time to visit here and for all the great comments.
Very interesting to hear what all of you think about being either an introvert or extrovert.
Hmm, very interesting. I'm considered an introvert because I'm, how shall I say it? "Still." I speak softly without waving my hands--make sense? My actions and reactions aren't overt, people might have to look closely to see what I really think. BUT--in my heart I am not introverted.When longtime friends learned I was writing romance novels, they were shocked, to say the least. What responses did I hear? "You're so quiet. You sometimes seem shy. You don't make yourself the center of attention." Still waters run deep, my friend! Diane, this was a great post, and I loved hearing about your daughters. Celia
Great post and provoked a lot of thought. Loved the other comments, too. I enjoy people and interacting with them gives me a charge, but there are times I just have to withdraw to write or to just be still. Can one be a mix? If so, then I think that's what I am.
See, that's neat, Celia, that people are surprised that you are a writer. What fun!
Rebecca, a mix is good for a writer. I like to be by myself at times and have complete quiet.
LOL! So many years I thought I was an introvert too. Then one day I was told at work that I wasn't shy at all. Same reasons as you Diane. Very friendly. Said hi to everyone.
It's all a matter of perspective. We're intro-extraverts. :)
Yep, I agree with Karen. Introvert, for me, means you need alone time to re-energize. Extrovert means you need people.
I'm a very vocal introvert (I forced myself to learn how to be vocal 'cause, well, quiet and shy people have a more challenging time being successful). Being in a crowd of people zaps all my energy.
My hubby is an extrovert. He is hyper, hyper, hyper after being in crowds or attending parties.
EA,
I like the term you used for us...intro-extraverts! Very creative! :)
Hi Kimber,
That's neat your husband is an extrovert and you're an introvert. Nice balance.
I started a scoring job yesterday and I love it because I'm around people.
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